A Heads Up

And A Homework Assignment... Warning

The Best Way to Write a Good Book

My advice is to write about a character who’s living through your reader’s worst nightmare. Yes, show your reader someone who’s trapped in the worst situation possible… and then show that character surviving. The reason we love those classic sit-coms? Those television shows like The Brady Bunch and The Partridge Family and Full House and, well, everything, the reason those shows succeed is because at their secret core is horror. A parent has died. The dead mom or dad or both is the worst fear of every child, and when we see such children living on — surviving, even thriving — our heart rushes to them. Those children have survived the worst thing we could imagine. Such children become our heroes.

If You Didn’t Recognize the Above Picture…

That is Amanda Knox. She’s lived such horror, and yet she’s survived to write her second memoir, Free. The book is wonderful and wise, and even if you don’t buy it I hope you’ll stop to meet her at her Free event this coming Friday, May 2nd, in Portland. I’ll be hosting the event to help support the book and to meet and share ideas with such a bright, smart fellow writer. The event will be at the Powell’s Bookstore at Cedar Hills Crossing. Address: 3415 SW Cedar Hills Blvd. Beaverton, OR 97005.

The event begins at 7:00 in the evening. Oh, dear, if you click that link… I sincerely wish they’d used a different author photo for me. But do come say hello and meet Amanda in person.

Now the Pre-Homework Homework

This guy is Spalding Gray, and during the ’80s and ’90s his one-man shows were a huge draw. During that golden era of one-person shows — Gray’s, Lilly Tomlin’s, Gilda Radner’s, Whoopi Goldberg’s — you could watch real on-stage storytelling. It wasn’t just stand-up comedy. Such writers could work the spectrum from funny to tragic to profound. All within a small window of time.

When writers like Gordon Lish ask that fiction sound less “Writerly” this is what I envision. While most Modernist prose sounds like a writer wrote it… Gray and his peers’ work sounds like you’re sitting with a real person — who just so happens to be an extraordinary storyteller. Such performers were a marvel to watch, and doing so will teach you some tricks for creating immediacy your own work.

Me? While trying to sell the first failed version of Invisible Monsters to a publisher, I sublet an apartment in NYC and saw Spalding Gray at the Performing Garage. He was astounding, and his power made me want to become a better writer. At the time I met with a half dozen editors and none bought Invisible Monsters, but a few years later I sold one of them Fight Club. So maybe Spalding Gray had time enough to work his magic in my head.

Whatever the case, please give him a watch Here. Or Here. Or Here.

In particular, please look at how Gray manages silence. Most of us rush forward, we’re so afraid of silence. But look at how deftly Gray switches between characters and sequences.

To watch Lilly Tomlin tell her epic story, here click. Imagine telling such a story alone, with the limited props and time available in theater — THAT is peak Minimalism. During the golden age of Gorden Lish, such people were our heroes. Prose can do that! You can do that!

The Real Homework Assignment to Come Soon

But if you study close and win, you’ll get this:

The Folio Society produced a very limited edition of The Great Gatsby with an introduction written by me, and I’ve signed them all. They cost a minimum of $500 each, and the entire lot sold out within ten minutes of being offered. They’re so Sold Out you can’t even find the book on the Folio Society website. This is it, here. The book is beautifully illustrated and bound — and they sent me One Copy. It’s in the original unopened packaging — worth $500+ — and you can win it if you do this week’s homework really, really well. You can all learn, but only one person will win. Note, I can only send this book to a person in the United States. The Customs/Shipping world is too f’cked up right now to trust with this glorious book.

Yes, to repeat, it sold out in ten minutes!

The impending Homework Assignment will be fun, but it will look difficult. I promise to post it at some odd hour, but we’ll be chewing on this project for a few days. It’s not a horse race, people.

Can You Tell?

I just delivered a new book after months and months in the forest? And my agents are thrilled. And now I’m back to Substack, great guns. Did you miss me?

Please come meet Amanda Knox on Friday. Give Spalding Gray a look. And put on your thinking caps for a chance to win a very pricey book.