Hope you're doing well, Chuck. You won't be seeing me for a while. I have fallen victim to talking about writing more than I do it. So I'm kinda forcing myself to take a hiatus from your Substack after today until I finish a story. It might take 3 weeks or 3 months. Hope you understand. Coming back will be my reward for having done the work. And if you see me in the comment section without a story, that means you get to yell at me into oblivion and shame the shit outta me too. Everyone can.
Chuck, thanks for encouraging and prodding us all along. I wonder if you might consider with these exercises, and maybe even with this one, "one sentence" feedback to the submitters.
In the zone, incomprehensible, abandon this, too many thinking verbs, etc. Whatever brief comment might be helpful to push each of us in the right direction.
To wit, I showed my entry to my wife and a friend and they both had no idea what I was getting at. I realized I was trying so hard not to be overly direct, that I wasn't adequately describing the scene. I even had a theme which did not come across. So I edited my entry to add more description such as "in order to make herself cry" as a preface to a character trying to make herself cry because without it, it wasn't coming across. I had wanted the speaker to be undefined as to leave open the two characters'relationship so the reader could decide - but that was confusing so I added several "her friend said"s.
But with these edits, it feels like I moved the entry from the "reader discovering" to a narrative, which is less satisfying at least when I'm reading.
Congrats, Peter!
Hope you're doing well, Chuck. You won't be seeing me for a while. I have fallen victim to talking about writing more than I do it. So I'm kinda forcing myself to take a hiatus from your Substack after today until I finish a story. It might take 3 weeks or 3 months. Hope you understand. Coming back will be my reward for having done the work. And if you see me in the comment section without a story, that means you get to yell at me into oblivion and shame the shit outta me too. Everyone can.
Thanks for understanding <3
Joe G.
Congrats, Peter! It was definitely a neat take.
Congratulations, Peter!!
Congrats, Peter - Colorado represent!
Woohoo! [clapping] [trumpets]
Boooo.
Congratulations Peter!
Chuck, thanks for encouraging and prodding us all along. I wonder if you might consider with these exercises, and maybe even with this one, "one sentence" feedback to the submitters.
In the zone, incomprehensible, abandon this, too many thinking verbs, etc. Whatever brief comment might be helpful to push each of us in the right direction.
To wit, I showed my entry to my wife and a friend and they both had no idea what I was getting at. I realized I was trying so hard not to be overly direct, that I wasn't adequately describing the scene. I even had a theme which did not come across. So I edited my entry to add more description such as "in order to make herself cry" as a preface to a character trying to make herself cry because without it, it wasn't coming across. I had wanted the speaker to be undefined as to leave open the two characters'relationship so the reader could decide - but that was confusing so I added several "her friend said"s.
But with these edits, it feels like I moved the entry from the "reader discovering" to a narrative, which is less satisfying at least when I'm reading.
Thanks
Eric
VERY WELL DESERVED!!! Congratulations, Peter!!!
Congrats, Peter! 🎉
Thanks, Chuck, and thanks everyone else. I had a lot of fun reading all the different takes.
Yay Peter!!
Context is the key to everything.
Disheveled and lost, Chuck, I worry that it’s all very superficial and random. ‘Tis your style no?
Congratulation, it was a great one