73 Comments

Maybe they should call it the "grating" sidebar, given its likelihood of annoying just about everyone. I hope there's a way to turn it off. ;)

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Or what they should do is offer a "Chuck Palahniuk mode" that encourages innovative use of grammar. :)

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Hah!

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Palahniukanese

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That sounds like a dog breed haha

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founding

I enjoy this term greatly.

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In French, this translates to Jouissance. A very particular kind of enjoyment.

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founding

Oooooh myyyyy...*Grins* Good morning Deep.

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Yawza

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Gramnerly would not be your friend. 🤣😂

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Gosh, I love that term, "reinvent language".

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I'd even add on, "reinventing the uses of language.""

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Freud called it "a torture house" (language that is) & Heidegger, "Man does not speak language, language speaks man."

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Oh yeah and Burrough's, "Language is a virus from outer space."

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author

Yikes, that's good. Tom Spanbauer always said, "Language is not our first language."

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Have you seen any of the paintings of Cy Twombly?

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WPS is your friend. I havent used it much, because I use Google Docs, but tech companies are conquistadors of the useless who design applications for people who hate having agency.

Google Docs capitalizes and changes words automatically and it is infuriating. Just let me type what I want to type. I am unpredictable text.

When did everyone decide that having zero control over the things that they do was cool with them?

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Youve inspired me to try WPS instead of dealing with these docs annoyances.

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I easily disabled the annoyances.

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founding

That does sound annoying. Can it be disabled?

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It can. You’d have to go in settings and uncheck which grammar aspects you want off.

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Dude, just use Word's “Focus” mode. When keyboarding, I can’t stand to look at anything on the screen other than my own gibberish.

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I wasn’t there for Clippy, but I understand it and agree this is like a Clippy Twitter social justice warrior. I’ve been told my word usage is “offensive” for fiction story dialogue. These recent updates are incredibly frustrating when writing poetry as well.

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author

His name was "Clippy"?

I did find a way to turn off the sidebar. But I rather like the idea of being called out for offensive language.

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Yep, Clippy.

I would feel more like a leather clad rebel if they didn’t call words like “old” offensive

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Loved clippy's gyrations while booting! :-)

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Hey Chuck, do you remember a program called Bonzai Buddy? It's sorta like Clippy, a virtual assistant, but it did so much. It could tell jokes, recite facts, it could sing, it even had a text to speech feature. I always downloaded it when I was a kid back in the early 2000's for the text to speech.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/BonziBuddy

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I think Bonzi Buddy and Jeeves died in a murder/suicide.

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That is why Jeeves is not available for questioning anymore haha

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Also, if I ever start a bucket list, I'd put this on it: Read a Gloves Off post where Chuck improves the first chapter of 50 Shades of Grey lol

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Nah, not ready to bail. I just roll with it. I am used to someone or something pointing out what I am doing wrong. I try to learn from it while not taking it personally; it is a program and therefore doesn't always recognize creative geniuses like us!

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That's why Typewriter is still my main hombre.

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author

Call me and I'll change those messy ribbons. Not.

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I've missed a chance to really taste hell by sidestepping Typewriters. Worth seeking out? -10 out of 10?

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Negative ten out of ten? Or just regular ten out of ten?

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Like most things in Microsoft office, I suspect it can learn. I just teach it what I like and dislike or turn the feature off completely.

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Maybe I'm the odd one out here, but I'm a big fan of writing with Scrivener.

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Honestly I think someone like you Chuck would try to see how low of a score they could get while still having a great finished product.

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-15 for grammar: Achievement Unlocked

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Couldn’t this work in your favour? Like seeing the prompt just reminds you that you’re making a conscious effort to burn the language -- which is as intended.

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Where's the Review > Burn Language option.

FWIW, I use free OpenOffice, started by Sun Microsystems but now maintained by Apache.

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I tell it to shut up when text is between “quotation marks cause nimrodAI” or turn it off altogether.

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Is it still possible to turn off the grammar checker? I've been working in Scrivener only for a long time.

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Yes. It is. go to settings / preferences and turn it off.

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I don't think I can count the number of times Chuck has clicked the "ignore suggestion" under a correction lol

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This is the evolution of Clippy but like in Idiocracy. I love Scrivener but it took a minute to get used to.

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'Hey! It looks like you're writing a letter'

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author

'Hey, it looks like you're writing a suicide note.'

'Hey, it looks like you're writing a manifesto.'

'Hey,it looks like you're writing a ransom note.'

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Hey!

SATIN ISLAND

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If you don't use any of these for a memoir title, this a waste of a thread.

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Why even use Word to being with. Yeah I prefer Open Source, and sometimes I use Dark Room (look it up) for distraction free writing

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Watching Misery as I cook tea and I'd love to see an Annie Wilkes proofreading prompt that shouts, 'You dirtybird!'

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Me too. Definitely!

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As a managing editor in children's book publishing by day, I am not a fan of this for a number of reasons.

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Is there no way to shut that stupid garbage off? Who invented that?

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Word is the opposite of open source.

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founding

I use an app called Ulysses. It's a distraction free environment.

https://ulysses.app/

APple devices only at this time

Bill Skates

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Its 'free' with setapp. A subscription service for apple. 10 dollars a months hundreds of apps including ulysses. https://setapp.com .

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I've been writing in Scrivener for YEEAARS.

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Ulysses is my writing app. A power house in simplicity.

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personally, I use manuskript! keeps my stuff organized, it's open source, free, and looks good to me. I'd suggest backing it up every so often, but otherwise I've never had a problem.

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founding

UPS just arrived. You’re awesome, Chuck! I was smart and opened this one outside. Never gonna rid my house of last year’s iridescent tinsel. Might be a selling point, though. “That’s Chuck Palahniuk’s arts & crafts herpes shimmering beneath the baseboards, tangled in the carpets, and whistling in the vents!” But seriously, thank you!

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author

You're welcome! And glitter is the "scabies" of arts & crafts.

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I loved that paperclip.

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We might be able to abandon writing altogether. This is scary.

https://apps.apple.com/us/app/chat-with-ask-ai/id1668787639

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I've been using Google Docs for about a decade, and I've only used Pages a few times to see if there were any new features worth switching for.

I haven't lost a single word while typing in the last decade, although I think that's less of a problem these days with Word. However, I cannot confirm this as I don't use it.

Google Docs (now Google Drive) does have an offline version that works across devices, so you can keep notes on your writing on the go, even on your phone. I use this quite often when I have sudden ideas and want to add them to the outline of my book to check later when it's time to write.

I have multiple books in various stages of completion, with partially fleshed-out outlines waiting to be written. Most of the notes were added when I was out and about, away from my computer, and had an idea that I might not remember later if I didn't capture it in the moment.

Getting feedback on your reading is quite easy too by sharing your doc with someone in commenter mode only or you can let them suggest edits, sort of like when a teacher crosses out a sentence but then includes the new sentence in its place. I assume word has that too, but google docs was the original real time multi-person document editing platform and there are few that come close to it from my experience. Suggesting mode is pretty cool when working with multiple people.

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I jumped into a Grammarly-esque program for more cash than I'd like to admit. Like lots of other things I put stock in, I calmly awaited salvation that it kinda-sorta promised. My wife looked at some sample work, then looked at me, then frowned a little. That's how I felt in my heart.

I think the "do this, it's better" apps may accidentally, or purposefully, be the devil?

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I use scrivener with the edits turned off. Damn those squiggle marks.

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I hate those tools. I'm using the word Hate here. I go into the bowels of user preferences and close it immediately. As with any auto-correct or spellcheck. When I'm typing and a squiggly appears, I can't quite ignore it. But if I go back and "fix" it, often I lose that bit of ethereal momentum.

Here, I will advocate for the devil known as Clippy (and its ilk). I volunteer as an Adult Basic Education and ESL teacher, and those tools I hate for creative flow are wonderful for learners. If you never spent time on spelling / typing / grammar and now the economy has changed so that entry level jobs require a keyboard interface, those tools are a great asset. To create a fresh hell for myself I enrolled in a Coding Bootcamp, and the code editor VS Code has a very similar function which I rely on heavily.

So in the art of writing, such tools are like putting a cast on our third eye. In the modern Lord of the Flies that is middle-class survivalism, it is an asset.

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founding

Time for some Libre Office on the old Linux OS?

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My friend Cathy ois known for malapropism/ which we entitled Catharsisisicm

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