76 Comments
User's avatar
Kimberly's avatar

As an overgrown child, I cannot wait for the spotted dick jokes.

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Atticus Blake's avatar

Can I stuff my face with your spotted dick?

That came out wrong.

Or did it?

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Kimberly's avatar

😹😹😹

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Karie Anne's avatar

Soooooooo right!

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Tiffany Mathias's avatar

I have never opened an email faster

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Karie Anne's avatar

Neither did I? I actually got a notification lmao!

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Karie Anne's avatar

So you are giving me my first spotted dick??? As if...

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Brandan's avatar

Isn’t it always annoying at the dinner table when you avert your gaze momentarily, only to return it and find your gran’s lips wrapped around your scrumptious dick?

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Sean Bohl's avatar

Does it really taste that good? This is British Cuisine we are talking about.

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Brandan's avatar

Considering I’ve never deviated from my strict diet of fish, chips, biscuits and tea, I wouldn’t know.

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Sean Bohl's avatar

You have never eagerly filled your mouth with some tasty dick? I have filled my mouth with some greasy and salty Dicks' before maybe it's just a Seattle thing.

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Brandan's avatar

This mouth was made for nothing so crude. It exists solely to sing ‘Rule Britannia’ and to consume all that is related to sea men.

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Sean Bohl's avatar

So Admiral Nelson had you in a full Nelson and you that is how you had your first taste of the sea. Men are made that way or should I say sailors.

That is totally how the crossing the line ceremony works in the US Navy except Davy Jones holds us in a full nelson while King Neptune gives us a taste of the sea. Man it feels good to get that off my chest.

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Brandan's avatar

I don’t know about all that. Captain Popeye just slipped me some of his fish fingers.

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Karie Anne's avatar

So is spotted dick chewed, sucked, slurped etc.....

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Cheap & Crass's avatar

Flambe. You have to douse it in alcohol and pull out a blowtorch. Always"a" blowtorch. Never "your" blowtorch...

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Karie Anne's avatar

I can't with you .....

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Cheap & Crass's avatar

Love.

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Caz Hart's avatar

You sound like a messy eater.

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Karie Anne's avatar

I am at that....

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Katy Harrison's avatar

Nothing makes your Sunday like my Grandma's Spotted Dick.

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John Raisor's avatar

Should give out some herpecin with those

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Chuck Palahniuk's avatar

I can't wait to itemize this on my taxes...

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John Raisor's avatar

"Umm, Mr. Paulaynyuk, we have some questions about your expenses. Did you give a kangaroo herpes?"

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Jake Gardner's avatar

Allegedly. 😎

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Sean Bohl's avatar

I'm sure Chuck's CPA has gotten used to it at this point. The bigger standout would be the itemized expenses for the gun range field trip. I can see some fresh faced IRS agent scanning over his filing. All of a sudden he jumps up ands shouts. I KNEW IT! A few moments later the Director of the IRS is calling the president. Active the Durden Protocol.

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Eric Iversen's avatar

There is a tax-related inventory shrinkage joke lurking here.

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Fd Harper's avatar

Neither can I. How do you think the IRS gets entertained?

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Dane Owen's avatar

Genital warts joke **loading**

Catholic priest joke **loading**

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Brandan's avatar

I thought this post was originally a fake-out for the quiz answers. Had to slam the brakes on posting answers and take second to recalibrate to posting dick jokes.

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Cheap & Crass's avatar

God I haven't even had a chance to watch the movie! AAAAA..

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Brandan's avatar

Could be that the post goes live at 3 a.m. (over here anyway). You could maybe complete the homework before the teacher comes to collect.

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Cheap & Crass's avatar

Word! Life always finds a way. :p

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Cheap & Crass's avatar

Dishes are done, man.

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Alexander Ipfelkofer's avatar

You spotted Tracy? The Dick Tracy??? Well spotted, sir.

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Craig Father Of Kittens's avatar

Would you like some of my Spotted Dick to go in your Toad-in-the-Hole?

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Cheap & Crass's avatar

I'm always telling people to eat a bag of dicks...it's my favorite pass time. I must stock pile as well...

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DeepArcher's avatar

Degrassi!

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DeepArcher's avatar

My Son's Mother made me watch like every season of next generation. Since the baby was still quite small we didn't have much else to do.

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Coco's avatar

☠️

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Jake Gardner's avatar

So I guess no one’s told you that Lockheed has a hypersonic bomber program called Project Mayhem?

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Atticus Blake's avatar

Holy shit. It’s true!

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Chuck Palahniuk's avatar

Shit! Shit! Shit!

If this is true my life's mission is accomplished. Gravy from here on out.

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