The Game: Our Next Round

Moving Toward a Critical Mass

We’ve Almost Got Enough to Work With

In Tom Spanbauer’s workshop, when we began to study the work of Amy Hempel, I envisioned her best stories as “laundry lists.” In stories like Deliver Us Not Into Penn Station and The Harvest and In the Cemetery Where Al Jolson is Buried, she seemed to be giving us a list of discrete details or moments. A list, as it were. In Cemetery the line of flight kicks off…

"Tell me things I won't mind forgetting," she said. "Make it useless stuff or skip it."

I began. I told her insects fly through rain, missing every drop, never getting wet. I told her no one in America owned a tape recorder before Bing Crosby did. I told her the shape of the moon is like a banana—you see it looking full, you're seeing it end-on.

This allows the narrator to list trivia. At first, no piece of trivia relates to another except for the quality of being forgettable. Some of the trivia is true, some not. Each is short, pithy. Sticky, let’s say. Hempel need not blurt out “I sat bedside as my best friend died!” Who’d want to read that!??. No, instead, she introduced the idea of death subtly, by listing all the things we’re happy to forget. Using the stained-glass-window metaphor, these are the weeds and sandals we’re happy to recognize and accept at eye level. To use the Skipper’s-Seafood-metaphor, this list of forgettable things is the cascading series of television commercial images: Napkins, signage, drink cups, fried fish, hush puppies… all the specific details that combine to suggest delicious fried fish in our minds.

This is Minimalism at its most pure. In Modernism, each sentence would serve only as a signpost urging us forward, all the joy would be deferred to a reveal at some distant point near the end of the story. In Minimalism, each sentence or paragraph can provide its own reward. My special thanks to everyone who has offered up Bios. Thank you for participating, without you there is no party.

If Hempel keeps us in a scene, she does so only for a short paragraph before introducing another bit of trivial. Slowly some of the trivia — nonthreatening, funny — forms the pattern of the gorilla, Koko, who learned sign language. The forgettable tidbits about Koko begin to form a pattern in our minds. Even as the dislocated details about the setting — a hospital — and the friendship begin to hint at what we’re actually watching.

She shakes out a summer-weight blanket, showing a leg you did not want to see. Except for that, you look at her and understand the law that requires two people to be with the body at all times.

Plus, by stating that all of this is intended to be “forgetable” Hempel creates the opposite effect: She gives us a story that is unforgettable. Whenever you introduce something, you also infer its opposite. The first rule of Fight Club is you don’t talk about…

My point is, Hempel does not tell the reader anything explicitly. We’re not trapped in a linear moment-by-moment reality. As in The Harvest she curates the most memorable details and relays only those.

There was sometimes, on the other side of me, a twelve-year-old boy. His lashes were thick and dark from blood-pressure medication. He was next on the transplant list, as soon as —“ the word they used was harvest —“ as soon as a kidney was harvested.

The boy’s mother prayed for drunk drivers.

What we’re seeing is a series of compelling fragments. And if this is done right, those fragments will assemble themselves in the reader’s mind, and only there will they have their full effect. Another metaphor:

In a way, we’re arranging cut flowers. First we look for the best, the freshest, the best-smelling stems. Then we root them into a vase full of water. We look for vacant places in the arrangement. We add more flowers to fill those holes, or we add greenery to buttress weak stems and to accentuate the blossoms. We might arrange and rearrange — yes, like decorating a Christmas tree — in a constant quest to balance the total effect.

It’s easy to picture Amy Hempel starting from a series of lists:

• The sweet, neutral forgettable items such as Bing Crosby’s tape recorder

• The details about Koko the gorilla

• The details about the neighborhood

• The details about the friendship

• The details about the death taking place

Like cut stems of flowers, each item is the best it can be. Each she inserts and removes and relocates until she’s used them all. Then she looks for holes in the whole arrangement, and she racks her brain for just the right detail to fill that hole or beat-of-time in the coalescing story.

Which Brings Us to Our Game

In our rapidly coalescing story About Our Contributors, we’ve begun with our core of very straight-faced Bios. Then we’ve added a second round of Bios that spring board off the first, but suggest a relationship to those original Bios. For this next round, we’ll create new Bios, but ones that will continue to develop the subtle backstories — the hints of politics and love and action — new Bios that link all the writers who’ve contributed to our fictitious anthology of short fiction. As always: Escalate and Morph.

Note: Always keep our format in mind: Author’s name, title of work in this collection, misc. Shorter is better.

Eventually these threads will be broken up and organized in a less obvious way, but a way that allows the reader to recognize the patterns of relationship. For now, the stems of like flowers are still heaped together as follows:

Cheryl Chatterton, author of “Salutations of Distant Remembrance,” is the editor of the online magazine ‘Encouraging Good Behavior through Somatic Reinforcement.’ She penned her debut poetry collection, ‘Fond Embraces’ in the span of a sleepless weekend. When she is not organizing a family reunion as the Chatterton matriarch, Cheryl enjoys desert herb gardening and pebble painting. Cheryl lives in Sheridan, Wyoming with her son and daughter-in-law.

Pebble D. | Author of 'Anthropoidic Mycelium' and member of the North American Mycological Society. Enjoys going on mushroom forays and rock climbing. Included in the viral New York Times article titled, "2024's Biggest Plant Shows" photo bombing Cheryl Chatterton at the IFPA The Global Produce & Floral Show. Photo caught a rip in Cheryl's pants revealing hot pink leopard print and a liposuction scar.

Dudley Trank, 'Water Your F'ing Lawn,' doesn't have time for unshaved pits, hippies on mushroom highs, or anything remotely leopard. In his spare time, serves as Mayor of Sheridan, Wyoming, and enjoys a good nap.

Note: This round, my choice was based largely on its brevity. We’ll need to vary the length of Bios to keep the reader’s interest. We still need to see this line escalate to a suggested action. Can you do that?

Genevieve S. Small, “Blink Twice If You See Me,” is also the author of several to-do lists she hasn’t gotten around to. She and her cat Lucy make their home in Brooklyn. This is her first published work.

Lucille van Ness, “A Familiar Tail,” moonlights as a bookseller in Greenwich Village and is always on the prowl for her next poem. Her recent work has appeared or is forthcoming in Blackbird, The Believer, and Passages North. In a previous life she oversaw the translations of Mark Twain’s musings. When she’s not composing found list poetry, Lucy can be found daydreaming on a fire escape in Brooklyn.

Jenny Asterberry, ‘Roommate Issues: When The Kitty Litter Won’t Change Itself’ with the recent posting ‘Your Cat Did Not Write That Bio, So, No You Can’t Blame That One On The “Dog”’ has attempted everything from Haitian Voodoo to Midwestern Canadian Zen and has found that enough is enough. The smell is causing her to blink more than twice. The next time she blinks, Jenny hopes to open her eyes to an apartment empty of Genevieve.

Note: Very good escalation on this one. First we intro the cat, then we develop the cat, then we up the ante with a miffed roommate. Imagine how this will work better once the pieces are spread a bit wider and spaced out by other Bios. The reader will be able to read and reread the finished story and discover something new each go-round.

Helena Ellison: Contributing author of 'Historia Veneficii'. Enjoys rose gardening and country side driving. Winner of the Berkshire Conference of Women Historians Book Prize. Member of the Latin National Honor Society and the International Guild of Knot Tyers North America. Currently working on a modern translation of the Heptameron. Collects antique blades and spring lancets. Earned a bachelors degree in history and masters degree in historical forensics at Miskatonic University.

Percy Fish, "Queer Burials: Love and the Death Industry," wants to emphasize that his name is NOT a typo. It is not Fisher nor Fishbach - it's just Fish. Fish received his BA in History at Dunwich Community College and uses it to trace back patrilineal lines and to write about your gay ancestors for his blog. His essay, "Last Rites in the Atlantic," was nominated for the Pushcart Prize. Fish has never left the Massachusetts coastline, and he never will. You can see him sometimes if you're on a country drive. Can't miss him - he has the exact look of someone named Percy Fish.

Olivia West, "Murder On the Road," resides in Arkham, MA. She works as a journalist at the Arkham Gazette, where she received numerous accolades for her reporting on the "less dead." The forgotten stab victims left by the roadside with roses in their mouths, and those that wash up to shore with throats clawed open. She dreams of one day winning a Pulitzer.

Note how the objects — blades and lances — are morphed in this latest Bio. That’s good escalation.

J. J. J. Jackson, author of "Nosferatu on the Shore", writes unapologetic fiction in his cabin in the woods, and lives completely off-grid and self-sufficient. His work has been called, ‘intimidating’ by Witness Magazine, and ‘unfathomable’ by That Books Guy. Jackson does not have a web profile or an email address. All book queries should be sent to PO Box 115, Arden, Texas. Internet Search Engine results will not report that all charges were dropped, but they were.

J. J. J. J. Gowanus, author of 'Dracula, a Oral History' has numerous vampire stories but alas, most are unpublished unless you count JJJ Jackass Jackson's ripoff of Nosferatu at the Beach, his ripoff of Vampire Syndrome by J. Gowanus or his virtual mimeograph of Bloodsuckers Delight by again, J. Gowanus. You better stay off the grid motherf----er.

J.J.J.J. Jonathan Harker, author of The Real Night Stalkers Among Us, resides in London when not on extended travel. On to you Jackson/Gowanus or should I say Graf Orlok. Google Earth shows me there are 64 properties in greater Arlen that are not on the grid. See you soon for sunrise cocktails.

Note, I loved how “Graf Orlock” gets dropped in with full authority. That and the brevity clinched it for me.

Larry Finkel, author of "The Everyday Politics of Candyland" can be found on his YouTube channel "Boardgame Everything." There he takes the time to explain the complexity of Clue to the rise and fall of the British Navy in Battleship. Please join us there.

Jerry Finkel, 'The order of the cards is set: Candyland, Birth Order, and The Illusion of Free Will', is the totally underappreciated younger brother of failed YouTube influencer Larry Finkel of "Boardgame Everything." Jerry is currently a student at Harvard University, with a full scholarship and a 4.0 GPA. Not that their dad gives a flip because he's too busy fawning over that idiot's stupid internet fame. Oh yeah, and while that lazy dirtbag is editing his dumb videos, who makes time to mow the lawn and trim the hedges? Not Larry. Who takes Mom out to dinner on Mother's Day? Not Larry, never big famous Larry.

Berta Finkel, author of “Sons: The Heartbreak and the Glory,” would like nothing better than her boys to make nice. She’s proud of both of them equally. From Larry she gets lots of free stuff he calls “swag,” but Jerry gives her more kisses. Both of them are available and ready to have a baby, girls!

Note, any Lovecraftian fish people available to bear a Finkel child? How can we escalate this in the next round? How could this threat cross or merge with another?

Liasa Leuken, ‘Her Story Wasn’t History’ and ‘Sheets of Sapphic Sheets of Yonic Sheets of Spells’ and ‘Unphallic Hill’ Is an MMC Trinity graduate who completed her double PHD studies in ‘Traditional Power Pre-Patriarchal Constructs’ along with a medical/anthropological/non-secular PHD in ‘Dianic Phallo-Constructs’. She runs a coastal-forest resort dedicated to the sacred connection that can only be found between HER with the Gaiaic Body. For inquiries: She inquires only.

Michael Northrop, ‘The Cost of Love’, began his MFA studies in his mid-twenties but never completed his degree, choosing instead to support his (now ex-)wife and maintain the household while she earned her dual PHDs in ‘Traditional Power Pre-Patriarchal Constructs’ and ‘Dianic Phallo-Constructs’, which seemed like the honorable thing to do, but in retrospect was hugely counterproductive. Between ten-hour shifts, grocery shopping, lawn work, cleaning, turning wrenches, pet care, and doting on his former beloved, he’s been able to eek out some time to pen the above, along with such stories as ‘How Could I Have Been Better?’, ‘The Myth of The Good Man’, ‘Come, Talk To Me’, ‘How Much Longer Must I Do This?’, and the poem ‘Tonight, It’s The Stranger For Me.’ He is currently seeking representation, both legal and literary.

Simone M. Northop, 'Dodging the Hanger,' has chosen to publish under her paternal last name. Her forthcoming antifeminist manifesto, 'Sex Twice,' is due out this Father's Day.

Note, I chose this based mostly on its being so short. A situation with three characters is emerging, but how does it escalate to suggested action?

S. S. Riley, 'The Undead Mistress of the Kennedy's', M.Ed., MT(ASCP)SM, working on a PhD in Supernatural Science. Look forward for their debut novel, "Ghost Abortions for Sale!", coming this winter. Preferring to let their work speak for itself, S. S. Riley is a pseudonym.

Vivian S. Vaine, 'Plan Boo,' is a self-taught expert in the strategic use of supernatural phenomena and jump scares for late stage family planning. Even though her methods are more effective and controversial than any of the outdated information you'd find in books like "Ghost Abortions for Sale!", and despite the fact that Vivian writes actual true things and not just fiction, she still has the courage to use her actual name. Pseudonyms, she firmly believes, are tacky and for cowards.

Xander Zalman: His latest release "Drop the Pen: The Inside Story of Authors Artificially Inflating Their Sales to Top the Charts." reveals Vivian Vaine, who writes under the pseudo name S.S. Riley, fabricating an author rivalry to take advantage of social media algorithms and negative media attention to boost sales.

Note, this is a nice suggestion that the Contributors might all be the same person, who’s playing next-level chess. Or is this schizophrenia rearing its lovely head?

My Special Thanks to everyone who dropped by Dark Delicacies for the book signing on the 23rd. That was a marvelously long day, and we gave out a boatload of swag. Del and Sue still have a basket of buttons that say “I Fuck Who You Want to Fuck” so if you drop by the store, I’m sure you can lay claim to one or ten of them.

You can’t be a writer without falling in love with booksellers. Del and Sue tell me that I broke the record set by Clive Barker for the longest book signing they’ve hosted. In April Dark Delicacies will close, but will likely stay active as an online business.