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I believe I’ve said it here already but it bears repeating. I once took care of a wonderful old codger whose name I can’t repeat because you know, hippa. But they said, “no one is thinking about you. They’re too busy thinking about themselves.” I only remember it because I was fretting over my first date with my now husband. I said I was too old to be going to gay bars and night clubs for meetups and dates. This person gave the best advice and I’ll always remember them cause they died shortly thereafter.

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Ah! Good morning. What a truism. The sweetest truism I've ever heard was about love and I don't know what movie it came from. A boy was telling his friend about the love of his life and how she moved. The boy never told her about his feelings and how he truly felt. His friend said "Isn't that sad? Aren't you sad that you never told her your feelings." The boy said "No. Absolutely not. It's great. My love for her was none of her business. The love I felt for her made me so happy and that was enough." I have others I will post as I remember them!

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Holy god, is that beautiful! All the resentment and unrequited love quenched in a sentence.

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Word. When I heard that I was like "Im gonna remember that because that is gangster as fuck!" LOL

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I think the movie you're thinking of is Adaptation, written by Charlie Kaufman in one of Nic Cage' best performances, said between the twin brothers sometime during the amazing ending in the swamp that justifies the slog getting there :)

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or... maybe not, sorry, here's the clip I was thinking of: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5oWuFSO926k

and in this situation, it's powerful because he knew the girl didn't love her back and he loved her anyway... so not the same, but in the same family of what to do with unrequited love?

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December 22, 2021
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Hello Friend. Stephen King had a good one that I carry around with me...From The Stand. I'm not particularly religious so it hits me really hard. "It don't matter if you believe in God Nick, he believes in you.“ BOOM. Wouldn't you agree?

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This is it! Thank you so much. This makes me happy. So funny how the memory is. This is so much more beautiful than I remember. I completely forgot but this is totally it.

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I’m delighted I was able to share your memory and it turned out to be even better than you remembered!

Now we can use this big voice / truism: many of my best memories are misremembered.

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YES!!! I REMEMBER! Thank you.

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City Slickers had a similar scene

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That’s the best piece or writing I’ve read this year . I’ve just Read it on a bus. Laughed out loud.wow.

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Failure is the portal into discovery

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Chuck likes!

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"People have more money than brains" - my Dad

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Of all the scripture and lore I have encountered, some gleanings may have equaled but none has surpassed the concrete statement

“Nothing fucks like crazy.”

I still remember where I was, clear as the summer’s day we stood in, when my friend Jesse Smith revealed this veil lifting pearl. Perhaps it’s countered in a Taoist sense by the ensuing lesson learned hard, which in the old country is a lesson learned well,

“But you don’t wanna marry it.”

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Nora Ephron said (among my fav quotes) "Sex is sex, but sex plus guilt is GOOD sex."

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I wonder if that quote has ever been used in a court case?

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"Never trust someone who spends more on their hair than on their music collection" has always been one of mine. Even more so in the era of streaming and 'everything is free now'.

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I wonder if it being stolen back in the 90’s and 2000’s on limewire makes it more valuable cause there used to be risk involved?

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Ha! Good point! The devaluation of art is something I could rant on for hours. Bore everyone half to death.

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Bore away. That topic would make an excellent thread. Fyi, as piracy rockets, guess what one type of book is exploding in sales....?

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Wait for it....

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December 22, 2021
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Nope. Not as big as the category I have in mind.

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Wait for it...

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I give... Lavish coffee table books. They remain a fast growing market.

Once I was at Book Soup in LA, when they still had one of the GOAT books by Muhammad Ali -- price range from $6000 to $15,000 depending on the amount of gold leaf. A staffer at the store phoned Elton John and offered the last copy. John bought it over the phone, but didn't come collect it for six months. Those books sell for crazy prices.

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The Communist Manifesto?

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Think "size".

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The Communist Manifesto coffee table book?

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I figure using Limewire back then was the digital equivalent of going to a bathhouse in the 80s.

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Alas, something I missed out on cause I was too young. Though I’ve heard it was a wild time.

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"The four letter word beginning with "L" that brings most people together is lust, not love."

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My parents lived in terror that us four kids would break something in a shop. Thus, "You break it, you bought it" and "Lovely to look at, delightful to hold, but if you should break it consider it SOLD."

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Reminds me of the handwritten sign in my grandmas bathroom: “if you sprinkle when you tinkle, be a sweetie and wipe the seaty.” Apparently no men in her household lifted the seat to piss.

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"When water sprays on water, it makes a sound for all to hear. But when water sprays on porcelain, the sound does not reach the ear."

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I am not ashamed to say that after years of catching splashback on my feet and legs, I sit down to pee these days.

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“Be like Pop, not like Sis. Lift the lid before you Piss”

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One I tell my kids all the time: if you're the only one laughing, it isn't funny.

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I think it should be the other way around. "If you're the only one who's laughing then it's the only time it matters" ;P

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If I'm the only one laughing I simply realize that everyone is deaf or doesn't speak English. Chauvinism will save you enormous heartache.

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Either it isn't funny, or you are the only one in the room with a sense of humor.

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I was gunna say. You may just be in the wrong room...

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There are two types of people in the world, and they're both preposterous but the most preposterous are the ones that don't know they are.

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An ancient Tibetan Monk's saying on shaving certain parts of the body--"One who tidies their living quarters is one who expects company there."

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Doesn't Jordan Peterson say that when he says, "Clean your room"?

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I sure hope so

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That's right Bucko!

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He has all the best quotes. His quote about writing hit me so hard I joined a certain writing course. "The best way to teach people critical thinking is to teach them to write because there's no difference between that and thinking.

No one ever tells students why they should write something. "Well, why are you writing?" "Well, you need the grade." It's like, no! You need to learn to think because thinking makes you act effectively in the world.

If you can think, and speak, and write, you are absolutely deadly. Nothing can get in your way.

If you can formulate your arguments coherently, make a presentation, speak to people, and lay out a proposal, people give you money; they give you opportunities; you have influence. That's what you're at university for.

Be articulate. Because that's the most dangerous thing you can possibly be."

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"The Pen is mightier than the Sword".

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And my goodness have I found that out. Serious consequences. I'm a quick study apparently. lolol

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"In a tyranny, everyone lies all of the time"

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The iChing is not mystical or magical. It just forces you to view a problem from 64 different perspectives. Idealogues have one perspective and they try to use that to fix every problem.

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It’s an Aqualung lyric, but it sticks with me. “Be careful what you hope and you pray for. You know you only get what you pay for.”

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If we're including famous quotes:

"I'd rather be hated for what I am than loved for what I am not" - Cobain

"Socialists don't love the poor, they hate the rich" - Orwell

"The only people I can be with now are artists and people who have suffered; those who know what beauty is, and those who know what sorrow is: nobody else interests me: - Wilde

"Time is no healer. The patient is no longer here" - T.S. Elliot

"Make no mistake: Irony tyrannizes us" - DF Wallace

"The damaged love the damaged" - Palahniuk

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December 22, 2021
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Bugs Bunny: "I must be leaving now. Please don't think it hasn't been a delightful evening. Because it hasn't."

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"What dogs want is for no one to ever leave." Amy Hempel

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Mittens-Jar!

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Oh! "God is my co-pilot but I ran into a mountain and I had to eat him." :/ My bad.

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"You can shake it, you can squeeze it, you can whack it against the wall, but your prick must be back in your trousers for the last drop to fall." -- Lord Byron (Probably. Maybe. I don't know)

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My grandpa always said, “never let a trifle like the truth get in the way of a good story.” He also laid claim to inventing that statement too.

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Please everyone, email this last line of Blake's to Chelsea Cain. She once gave me a coffee mug with a quote of mine on it: "The truth is overrated."

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Burma Shave!

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"No matter how you shake and dance, the last drop goes into your pants." Edith Wharton, I think.

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Edith Wharton! Ha!

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I believe it's from 'The Age of Innocence.' Although it might be James, from 'The Bostonians.'

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I read 'Age of Innocence.' I'm almost certain it was in chapter three. It was a perfect introduction to beautifully coordinated dinner.

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Sadly omitted from the Winona Ryder film...

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I've said it here before but "If You Want To Tell People the Truth, You’d Better Make Them Laugh or They’ll Kill You"

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When I was a teen about to become voting age, I asked my dad his political party. He nonchalantly said "If you play with shit you're gonna get it on you." Then he went on about his business with no further explanation.

Every year since has proven that one of the greatest truisms about politics ever, imo!

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From my favorite 80s band, The Waitresses: “When you finally get a bone to throw, there’s no dog around to catch it.”

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Jordon Peterson just posted another great one this morning! "You should be a monster, an absolute monster, and then you should learn how to control it. It's better to be a warrior in a garden than a gardener in a war." I love it! This man is just wonderful.

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Very nice. The photographer Margaret Bourke-White said, "You should be able to create your work, then willing to put on a strapless dress to sell it." Georgia O'Keefe might disagree.

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December 22, 2021
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DO NOT make me link to the Jonathan Livingston Seagull soundtrack, again.

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I love that so much!

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oh man, so many... the one my wife finds most insufferable is probably, "what bothers you most in others is your most annoying trait." The context I discovered it (I think!) was when I worked retail one summer at a National Park, on days off I would hike (naturally) and I was relaxing on a cliff overlook and reading Thomas a Kempis' Imitation of Christ. At the time, my supervisor really annoyed me. He saw the flaw in everything and could never be happy!

Anyhow, it's one of those truisms that's good for you personally (and imagine how great society would be if every time anyone was annoyed with another's actions or attitude was a moment for reflection on personal improvement), but I've found it tends to backfire when you try to share it as advice to someone who is expressing frustration about someone else. Ends up, that person you hoped to encourage tends to just find themselves frustrated with an additional person.

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Interesting. This disdain of your own traits in others is called "the shadow" by Jung. In effect you don't see others fully, instead you first recognize parts of yourself in them. Your shadow falls over them. This was great stuff to read while putting together 'Fight Club.'

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Fascinating! Yeah, sounds like great stuff. I'll need to put it on my tbr list. The question I guess is - is seeing the shadow universal? Or do you have to be exceptionally self-centered to find it good advice for dealing with annoying people? I should probably also confess my theory of art appreciation is "you like most what you see yourself in." And I'm also a big fan of the Pascal quote, "Every war in the world has originated from man's inability to sit alone in a room with his own thoughts."

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Excellent. I'll chime in with a Fran Lebowitz line, "Stupid people like art that looks as if they could've made it themselves."

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December 22, 2021
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Nick Cave?

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Damn. That makes me a stupid person. Either that or a good artist.

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My partner and I have a saying we use whilst driving:

"You never see a Shit Truck from the front."

A Shit Truck essentially being any vehicle rhat blocks our path on the road. I want to think that there is some deeper meaning to that phrase. Probably not though.

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I love that. People who gossip and shit talk and have bad will rarely show their true face and avoid dealing with reality. That's why I don't trust bible thumpers.

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I'll start with one I really liked from the book Damned '' Don't make a date with a heart attack''.

'' Always remember that you have a choice, so choose to be calm and choose to not give a damn''

'' Stay true to yourself, and if everyone hates you? that's fine''.

'' Accept no free gifts, expect nothing and give nothing''.

'' Put two humans in a scale, there's always one who's dominating and exploiting the other, once you're aware of the dynamics, you can shift the balance to your liking''

From Life Of Brian cause it's funny '' always look on the bright side of life...(Whistle) ''

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December 22, 2021
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yesterday, a woman approached me in the Target parking lot as I was buckling my kids into their car seats. She said, "excuse me, Merry Christmas, how are you?" and before i could brush her off, she offered ME a twenty dollar bill! The complete reverse of what I was expecting. I said, no thank you. She said "pay it forward." I positioned myself between her and my kids and said, "really, i don't need it." and she smiled and said okay and walked off. My guess is she was trying to be nice, maybe saw a dad with three young kids and imagined i needed some generosity? (i've noticed dads out and about with kids tend to get compliments that moms don't). Or maybe she saw my daughter wasn't wearing shoes (because I forgot to throw them in the car with all the other stuff i had to pack up before the trip to the store!) But who knows? It was unsettling and perplexing and reminded me how as a parent I've largely retreated from interacting with strangers in parking lots.

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I remember I was coming home to California after being in London for a week and half. I had zero money and so I needed to hop over the rails with my luggage in order to get onto the London underground train to get home. I'm on top of the rails struggling to get my large piece of luggage over the rails. As I'm doing this I see this large handsome man suited up and he looks official as fuck and he's coming towards me with a straight face and fast. I think to myself "FUCK! I do not need this right now! I just need to get home. What am I going to do!?" Without changing his expression and without a word he barely slows down his pace to grab my luggage and bring over the rails then he grabs me like I'm the second piece of luggage and pulls me over the rails and keeps going! Not one word. No change of expression. I didn't even have time to say 'thank you'! There are good people out there.

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I love the quick sweep of this! Like Superman.

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Like Superman!

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'' Accept no free gifts, expect nothing and give nothing''. Hmmm...when I was a pretty and young thing I realized real quickly the gifts I received from the boys were not free. They were the most expensive. Still, Marla from Fight Club helped me justify keeping them. "Asshole tax" *Slams door*

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I don't accept free gifts, cause it's often people want something in return.. I don't like to be owned. The other reason is an odd one, It's local specific, and has to do with black magick. Some people in Morocco tend to exploit the general idea that a person shouldn't refuse a gift no matter what, so they'd often put poison food and give it to someone so they could rid off they're own bad luck.. stupid beliefs.

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Exactly Sir! So true!

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The way I figure it, a person's belief that I owe them something is an emotion that they feel in their own head.

It's not a real physical reality, and it's not a belief they can force on me.

Only I can decide whether I owe someone anything (and I often do decide that, of course! I'm happy to owe people favours under normal circumstances!) But if someone gives a free gift that secretly comes with strings, I take the gift and leave the strings.

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My favorite 'only two people in the world,' truism is from C.S. Lewis, "I begin to suspect that the world is divided not only into the happy and the unhappy, but into those who like happiness and those who, odd as it seems, really don’t.”

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“If wishes were fishes we’d all swim in riches.” - Stilgar probably.

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OH John Waters! Stephen King has heard this one before too..: “If you go home with somebody and they don’t have books, don’t fuck ‘em.”

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Waters has since updated that to “If they have books next to the toilet, don’t fuck them.”

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OOOOH! Nice! Thank you.

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if we're quoting Chuck back to himself, I've always been fond of the Lullaby era, "Still, with a plan, you only get the best you can imagine. I'd always hoped for something better than that.”

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Oh "Still, one minute you're just a kid getting off, and the next minute you'll never be a lawyer." Truer words have never been spoken.

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ha! yes.

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Damn, that line got the biggest laughs I've ever got. Non sequiturs rock.

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It's kinda epic and sums up life's most absurd moments in a hilarious but terrifying way. Thank you Sir.

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The one I made up in my head is great too :P "I realized today that quilts are a Grandma's version of a mixed tape."

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Grandmas version of NFT’s too.

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I should probably look into those. Shit.

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Nice.

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Too bad nobody knows what a mix tape is anymore.

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Not a saying, but a truism nonetheless… When you have a kid, a million people chime in with a million unsolicited tips. But the one you can *take to the bank* is this: Enjoy them every minute, from when they are young. Before you know it, you’ll be sending them off to college (or whatever), and it goes by fast. Word.

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God, I wish I had kids before I had a smartphone.

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There are three types of people in the world: those who know from an early age what they want to do with their lives and they do it; those who take a long time finding out what their vocation is; and those who spend their whole lives trying unsuccessfully to find fulfillment.

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“He who smelt it dealt it.” Just something funny I’ll never forget. It was said to me the first time by my mother on a long car ride to northern Maine. Funny. It was just her and I in the car to Caribou. I hadn’t farted.

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hahaha! your mom sounds fun.

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Ah a professor at Davis has a "Dirty Show" where he tells dirty stories and in one of them he states "People say 'Sex should be sweet and beautiful and something special.' People who say sex shouldn't be dirty has never had sex with me!" lolol

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A math teacher at my vocational school said “figures don’t lie but liars figure.”. That phrase has stuck with me and been proven true time and again in my life.

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Would that be the same as my math prof saying, “stats may not lie, but people can lie about them.”

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Stats don't lie, but they don't tell the whole story either.

And...

90% of all the statistics people cite are made up on the spot just like this one.

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I think Murphy said it best. Anything that can go wrong will go wrong

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“Never let someone drive you crazy, it’s nearby anyway and the walk is good for you.” – M. Engelbriet

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That half the world is more conservative than the other half.

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Eek! Sounds like a truism the rich tell us plebs to discourage us from trying!

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“You can have all the friends in the world, just don’t have a single opinion.”- Words of wisdom from my father.

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oh no! my mom used to say, "don't talk about sex, politics, or religion." which just happens to be what most everyone is most passionate about!

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I am failing to recall any truisms, but will share a couple redneckisms instead.

I once asked an old man how he was doing and he replied "If I were doin any better, I believe I'd quit." Best answer ever.

My favorite redneckism is something my Great Uncle said constantly when I was a kid, but I didn't consider its meaning until years later. "That's crazier'n owl shit." They don't shit, they regurgitate.

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Oh! “It is better to be looked over than overlooked.”― Mae West

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This Kurt Vonnegut nugget has stuck with me, likely to my detriment: “we are here on earth to fart around and don’t let anybody tell you different.”

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"A bad dancer blames his testicles." The literal translations of Russian proverbs are wonderful. Of course, to us in the west it means "a bad workmen blames his tools." So whenever I see a shoddy job … and whenever I see a bad dancer (very much like myself) I think ‘it’s not his fault.

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That is brilliant! I still recall the moment a Russian friend told me, "I need that like I need teeth in my asshole." Thank God I could write it into the 'Guts' story.

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I always thought having a ‘numb’ tongue in my butthole would be a true mark of evolution.

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To have such a tongue would make Covid and the lack of a sense of taste a plus.

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Everyone -- Please note how sticky these quips are. This is about writing. And a clear demonstration of how Big Voice can state something baldly and make a lasting impression. This is the kind of "crowd seeding" exercise that builds that Big Voice muscle.

If you'd like me to define Big Voice, sing out. I didn't here, because it's in Consider This and I don't want to risk repeating myself. Okay? Okay.

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December 22, 2021
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As Vonnegut said, "And I suppose they're all going to want respect."

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December 22, 2021
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Not anonymous. That's Holden Caulfield's character in Salinger's Catcher in the Rye.

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Never eat hooker pussy.

Never step over a dollar to pickup a dime. Don’t trust anyone that can’t drive a car either.

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On how many levels of irony would the quote “True genius comes when you quit quoting other people” from your book ‘Pygmy’ be operating on if posted in this thread?

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Well there are two truisms (I'll let you be the judge on whether or not they're trite) that are rolling around a lot in my mind lately.

One is an internet that says - "there's two ways to look at "no one gives a shit!" - one is a yellow, smiley happy guy jumping for joy, the other is a glum blue guy with a dejected look on his face.

The other is a quote from Nietzsche - "I hate who steals my solitude without, in exchange, offering me true company."

I find these two inter-related. I really, really hate having my solitude stolen. Why? Because it is never, ever exchanged for true company. It's exchanged for someone wanting an audience to chatter endlessly about some trivial, insignificant thing that no one else could possibly care about.

A man wiser than myself once said "our great depression is our lives." I think that's true for many of us, but Christ, please offer a guy a little give-and-take, and at least offer the pretense that you give a shit about him.

But then again, I think this problem is part of the root of our great depression as a society - no one gives a shit.

Oh, and by the way, just FYI for anyone reading, I'm a therapist. I'm going to start telling people I'm a plumber, or an accountant.

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Hah! I once sat in a television station green room with a plastic surgeon who said he never told people his profession. Otherwise, out came the scars and insecurities and pleas for an estimate.

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When I was thirteen and my father was on his death bed; dying of a rare esophageal cancer, he was barely ever awake. The last time he woke up he said, “I guess it’s like that line is Casablanca,’Do you know how to whistle? You just pucker up and blow.’” That line is not in Casablanca, ha! It’s in a Cagney film.

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“Smooth seas don’t make good sailors.” I assume it has an older origin, but I discovered it through the pop-punk band Neck Deep.

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You might as well ask for something as "A closed mouth doesn't get fed."

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The squeaky wheel gets the grease.

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“While money can't buy happiness, it certainly lets you choose your own form of misery.”

― Groucho Marx

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"The best things in life are free. The second best are very expensive." Chanel

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If you can smell yourself, it's bad.

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