Brilliant advice. I've always had the same thought upon seeing the cats all over the mystery section - I don't get it.
When I was taking art classes in community college, an instructor told the class [3d art] that he didn't want to see any cats. His take was that cats were overdone in the art space.
Being a cat-lover, I was annoyed. So the first sculpture I made was cats. I fully expected him to be upset. But he loved it. And he addressed the class and told them that if they were going to make cat sculptures, they should make sure they do it as well as I did.
Teacher: " Remember, no skulls. This isn't the back of your school bag, this is art."
Student: "But now all I can see is skulls. I'm looking at you and all I see is your skull. Your eyes have disappeared, rows of teeth, your skin is gone. The horror is real."
I'm not a big fan of romance novels, YA novels (superpowers in some fashion) normal YA stuff is fine, westerns, or most superhero comics. I also don't like the overplayed stuff like zombies, vampires, werewolves, MCU, oh my.
I am not a fan of romance novels either. Guess we got pick up a stack of Fabio covers as we get run down by a heard of racoons knocking down trashcans.
How do we put some punk rock into cheesy romance novels?
The scary aspect of YA superpower stories is how the parents are absent or killed. No child can achieve his/her full potential until he/she is an orphan. Makes me wonder how many kids have killed their folks in the hope that a superpower will follow.
It just plays into the teen fantasy of the desire for lack of supervision. Typically in all of those stories there is a fill in parental figure that gets defeated or killed by the protagonist. In some of the more popular ones, that I am aware of, the big bad is the father of one of the main characters like the Mortal Instruments series. Even Anime [light novels (novel with more pictures here and there but not as much as a manga) and anime] has it trope genres like "Isekai" where the protagonist dies or gets teleported to an alternative world where they have super powers of some sorts. Normal stuff like "I got reincarnated as a slime" or sexually depreaved stuff like "I got reincarnated as my highschool crush's new pet dog." Yeah I wouldn't go look that up that last one on a work computer. It's pretty bad. I really don't like that trend. I may write a short story that makes fun of that like I got reincarnated as my hot highschool teacher's toilet seat or some stupid nonsense. I figure that is about as popular as cat detectives. Neko-chan saves the universe before sushi dinner.
Police procedurals were never interesting to me. But this reminds me of a story I have about a detective trying to find a missing person. How to twist a detective story...
I think you’re just jealous that your country isn’t as sordid and sinister as mine is in some respects. Alas, you’ll never know the invigorating sense of terror you get as you lay awake at night on account of some maniac who’s going around housebreaking and vivisecting random people in your area (as is the bimonthly custom). Pity.
By the way, if anyone would like some last minute inspiration for the Headline Competition post, I’d recommend checking out this compilation of ‘Brass Eye’ clips: https://youtu.be/t2x4hMr2WLw
I’m not particularly fond of the Victorian romance novel. I read ‘Pride and Prejudice’ a while back for my uni course and I couldn’t even really finish it. By the time I was two thirds of the way through I think I was reading it with a pair of cross eyes and a slack jaw.
No, this is actually the first time I’m just now hearing of ‘Pride & Prejudice & Zombies’ by Seth Grahame-Smith and it’s 2016 movie adaptation. My ideas are all original, I swear.
The explosive recipes in Fight Club were all inspired by earlier books that contained recipes. Books such as 'Heartburn' and 'Like Water for Chocolate.' It was such a common device of that era that I wanted to spin it... with explosives. At the last moment the publisher asked me to change one ingredient in each recipe to render it harmless.
You wanna make something dangerous? Crumble Styrofoam and mix it into gasoline, stirring constantly, until the mixture is thick and "peaks" like whipped cream. It will stick to anything. Burn fantastically hot. And resists being extinguished. It's the only thing I recall from junior high school.
Inspired! I might have had brain surgery 4 weeks ago but reading this I felt a couple of creative synapses spark up weakly. Twee murder porn. Of course, thats exactly what I should attempt today instead of Wordle to get the brain wiring back in order. Thank you for your contribution to my recovery Mr Palahniuk. I look forward to telling my neurosurgeon that a suggest I try anglophile snuff porn triggered my comeback. Now you mention it, if there's a doctor anywhere near a small town murder scene my money is on them. Angela Lansbury knew the shit on doctors. No question.
Ugh. Initially, I was going to say I don’t know if there’s any genre I don’t like, but then I realized there totally is!!!! I’m not a fan of ambiguous weird fiction. I’ve read some great stories by Paul Tremblay and Brian Evenson, but I’ve also read some where I have no idea what is going on. And that’s the point! Here’s an example: “in the fog stood a woman, or maybe a girl, or maybe no one at all.” I get it’s supposed to be dreamlike, but c’mon! But Chuck! You’ve given me the key to fix it! Instead of one, frustratingly ambiguous story, I could combine two opposing tales, but still leave the truth ambiguous. Like this: “In the fog was a man, holding a knife, or maybe it was a dildo? He approached the couple from behind and either gutted them both or playfully poked them. The couple screamed in agony, or were they squealing in surprise?”
Nice! This answers a question I’d been wondering for a while -- which was basically weather you study successful books you don’t like just to understand what makes them work.
Do you think putting animals in peril is a bit of a cheap cheat at building suspense? I know you’ve recommended it before, but I sort of feel like it’s the easy way out.
Am I the only one who *really* wants to see the hooker in the soft glow of the bucolic countryside cottage? I thought for sure that would've been addressed in the comments. Might you have a link to share?
I think the Jeeves-Master-and-Servant stories would be a fun one to riff on. Don't know if I exactly "hate" them, even though the trope of the bumbling rich master and the in-control butler irritates me to the extreme. But yeah, throw in some raw emotion, and some elements of porn and Nietzschean philosophy and Philip K Dick and non-sequitur Def Leppard lyrics in there, and that might turn out enjoyable to write.
This reignite the spark for a story idea I tried to write before. I think I see now how I could make it work. It was already dark and twisted but now it will have that extra oomph it was missing. Thanks, Chuck!
Yes there are cats involved. No harm comes to the cats.
Just add zombies.
That’s a really, really good comment/image!
Now I’m thinking of a Caribbean all you can eat and drink resort. With zombies or For zombies? Maybe both?
Uhm—- I’m invested already. Netflix needs to make this, now. Just one episode. Each one is a short story.
Reminds me of the Burnt Tongues story about zombies that haunts me to this very day
Such a good collection of stories!!!
Brilliant advice. I've always had the same thought upon seeing the cats all over the mystery section - I don't get it.
When I was taking art classes in community college, an instructor told the class [3d art] that he didn't want to see any cats. His take was that cats were overdone in the art space.
Being a cat-lover, I was annoyed. So the first sculpture I made was cats. I fully expected him to be upset. But he loved it. And he addressed the class and told them that if they were going to make cat sculptures, they should make sure they do it as well as I did.
Art teachers also say, “no skulls.”
This makes me want to draw skulls!
Teacher: " Remember, no skulls. This isn't the back of your school bag, this is art."
Student: "But now all I can see is skulls. I'm looking at you and all I see is your skull. Your eyes have disappeared, rows of teeth, your skin is gone. The horror is real."
Teacher: "Draw that, then."
I'm not a big fan of romance novels, YA novels (superpowers in some fashion) normal YA stuff is fine, westerns, or most superhero comics. I also don't like the overplayed stuff like zombies, vampires, werewolves, MCU, oh my.
I am not a fan of romance novels either. Guess we got pick up a stack of Fabio covers as we get run down by a heard of racoons knocking down trashcans.
How do we put some punk rock into cheesy romance novels?
Are you going to write a book or a one shot campaign where you have to defeat Fabio with nothing but racoon bards or something.
That would be funny. Might make for a good one page TTRPG, Call it Trash Bandits.
Don't let Fabio trash his romance novels in your dumpster.
Have you read "After Delores" by Sarah Schulman? It's punk-noir-lesbian. Near impossible to find, but an excellent spin on the romance genre.
Challenge accepted!
Thank you for the suggestion! Found a copy for sale online!
The scary aspect of YA superpower stories is how the parents are absent or killed. No child can achieve his/her full potential until he/she is an orphan. Makes me wonder how many kids have killed their folks in the hope that a superpower will follow.
It just plays into the teen fantasy of the desire for lack of supervision. Typically in all of those stories there is a fill in parental figure that gets defeated or killed by the protagonist. In some of the more popular ones, that I am aware of, the big bad is the father of one of the main characters like the Mortal Instruments series. Even Anime [light novels (novel with more pictures here and there but not as much as a manga) and anime] has it trope genres like "Isekai" where the protagonist dies or gets teleported to an alternative world where they have super powers of some sorts. Normal stuff like "I got reincarnated as a slime" or sexually depreaved stuff like "I got reincarnated as my highschool crush's new pet dog." Yeah I wouldn't go look that up that last one on a work computer. It's pretty bad. I really don't like that trend. I may write a short story that makes fun of that like I got reincarnated as my hot highschool teacher's toilet seat or some stupid nonsense. I figure that is about as popular as cat detectives. Neko-chan saves the universe before sushi dinner.
Police procedurals were never interesting to me. But this reminds me of a story I have about a detective trying to find a missing person. How to twist a detective story...
I think you’re just jealous that your country isn’t as sordid and sinister as mine is in some respects. Alas, you’ll never know the invigorating sense of terror you get as you lay awake at night on account of some maniac who’s going around housebreaking and vivisecting random people in your area (as is the bimonthly custom). Pity.
By the way, if anyone would like some last minute inspiration for the Headline Competition post, I’d recommend checking out this compilation of ‘Brass Eye’ clips: https://youtu.be/t2x4hMr2WLw
I’m not particularly fond of the Victorian romance novel. I read ‘Pride and Prejudice’ a while back for my uni course and I couldn’t even really finish it. By the time I was two thirds of the way through I think I was reading it with a pair of cross eyes and a slack jaw.
Should have had some zombies in it.
Have you literally not heard of Pride & Prejudice & Zombies?
Bad novel and I think they made a film of it.
No, this is actually the first time I’m just now hearing of ‘Pride & Prejudice & Zombies’ by Seth Grahame-Smith and it’s 2016 movie adaptation. My ideas are all original, I swear.
Honestly if you had written it, it would have been a vastly better read.
One of the first books I walked away from
Looking forward to your new novel. Isn't this what you did with Damned and Doomed? A reimagined and twisted Judy Blume book.
The explosive recipes in Fight Club were all inspired by earlier books that contained recipes. Books such as 'Heartburn' and 'Like Water for Chocolate.' It was such a common device of that era that I wanted to spin it... with explosives. At the last moment the publisher asked me to change one ingredient in each recipe to render it harmless.
You wanna make something dangerous? Crumble Styrofoam and mix it into gasoline, stirring constantly, until the mixture is thick and "peaks" like whipped cream. It will stick to anything. Burn fantastically hot. And resists being extinguished. It's the only thing I recall from junior high school.
Had you read ‘The Anarchist Cookbook’ prior to writing ‘Fight Club’?
That was my next question lol
Inspired! I might have had brain surgery 4 weeks ago but reading this I felt a couple of creative synapses spark up weakly. Twee murder porn. Of course, thats exactly what I should attempt today instead of Wordle to get the brain wiring back in order. Thank you for your contribution to my recovery Mr Palahniuk. I look forward to telling my neurosurgeon that a suggest I try anglophile snuff porn triggered my comeback. Now you mention it, if there's a doctor anywhere near a small town murder scene my money is on them. Angela Lansbury knew the shit on doctors. No question.
Ugh. Initially, I was going to say I don’t know if there’s any genre I don’t like, but then I realized there totally is!!!! I’m not a fan of ambiguous weird fiction. I’ve read some great stories by Paul Tremblay and Brian Evenson, but I’ve also read some where I have no idea what is going on. And that’s the point! Here’s an example: “in the fog stood a woman, or maybe a girl, or maybe no one at all.” I get it’s supposed to be dreamlike, but c’mon! But Chuck! You’ve given me the key to fix it! Instead of one, frustratingly ambiguous story, I could combine two opposing tales, but still leave the truth ambiguous. Like this: “In the fog was a man, holding a knife, or maybe it was a dildo? He approached the couple from behind and either gutted them both or playfully poked them. The couple screamed in agony, or were they squealing in surprise?”
Five pages of that and I’ve satirized both weird ambiguous fiction and written a satisfying slasher and/or sex romp.
“Anglophile snuff porn”
I died laughing...
Nice! This answers a question I’d been wondering for a while -- which was basically weather you study successful books you don’t like just to understand what makes them work.
Do you think putting animals in peril is a bit of a cheap cheat at building suspense? I know you’ve recommended it before, but I sort of feel like it’s the easy way out.
Am I the only one who *really* wants to see the hooker in the soft glow of the bucolic countryside cottage? I thought for sure that would've been addressed in the comments. Might you have a link to share?
I think the Jeeves-Master-and-Servant stories would be a fun one to riff on. Don't know if I exactly "hate" them, even though the trope of the bumbling rich master and the in-control butler irritates me to the extreme. But yeah, throw in some raw emotion, and some elements of porn and Nietzschean philosophy and Philip K Dick and non-sequitur Def Leppard lyrics in there, and that might turn out enjoyable to write.
Is this approach something you did with "Tell All"?
Tell-All was inspired by old Walter Winchell columns.
This reignite the spark for a story idea I tried to write before. I think I see now how I could make it work. It was already dark and twisted but now it will have that extra oomph it was missing. Thanks, Chuck!
Yes there are cats involved. No harm comes to the cats.
Kinkade triggers me as badly as seeing blue colored pills. Ick!