62 Comments

Anton Chigurh’s ‘Do anything but put it in your pocket. It will become just another coin. Which it is.” always stuck with me

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Completely mangoes

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“For sale: clown shoes, worn once”.

Does that line never not pull at your heart? Did the clown die after one use or did someone give up on their dream? Tragic either way.

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Nice play on the Hemmingway line.

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I picture some clown coming home, slamming his door, throwing his shoes, and shouting, "These people think I'mma fuckin' joke."

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Tries to shoot himself but instead of a bullet a little flag with “BANG!” written on it pops out.

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Damn, that went dark real quick. Okay, balloons. Wraps a squeaky balloon around his neck but that pops instantly when he kicks the chair.

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He lands on his ass and confetti rains down on him from the popped balloon. Starts to sob uncontrollably.

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To make this all perfect, we need an AI Rod Serling voice to narrate the outro lmao

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Loved this. How I interpret this is...those sticky sentences are like condensed poems, condensed in a single line. And to be honest, I thought Hemingway was minimalist. I guess to the layman, he is. Here's my question to you, how can one know that each sentence is doing its job?

And one of your sticky lines, "Everything is a copy of a copy of a copy."

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author

That depends on its job.

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My favorite sentences leave me with an essence of a secondary sense effect. In Rant I was often left tasting warm Pennies. With Anne Rice one book left me craving milk. I find a good sentence can be a wholly physical experience. Maybe my brain is broken but it’s a fun way to experience the written word. I aim for that in my writing. I don’t know if I succeed at all but it’s the aim. A good sentence that tickles a sense.

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The taste of pennies is such a nice way to describe blood in the mouth. But it's like the only way I can think of describing that taste. Taste of metallic, sure, taste of iron, that's okay. Pennies is specific and more physical. We're all about getting physical lol

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Loved this. Thanks, Chuck.

My favorite song lyric:

“I’m still under you”

Voxtrot, The Start of Something

because of how saying, ‘I’m not over you,’ wrong makes you not forget it.

My favorite Amy Hempel sentence? The last one in her short short, Weekend:

“And when the men kissed the women good night, and their weekend whiskers scratched the women’s cheeks, the women did not think shave, they thought: stay.”

Ha. I never noticed the repetition of “women” until just now.

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For any strangers to Hempel:

https://coastalshelf.com/weekend/

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Geez, that's a great line.

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For anyone wanting a new favorite song, ha:

https://youtu.be/Y4a8_rtk5gI

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Would you ever write a post about Thom Jone’s The Pugilist At Rest? Not necessarily that short story but any in that collection?

As much as I appreciate Tobias Wolff and Denis Johnson, Hempel and Jones really stand out from the short fiction writers I’ve been reading side by side recently, as the quintessential female and male voice and gaze. If you ever have the time, I’d love to hear you unpack Thom Jones’s work.

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The Pugilist at Rest is such a great short story. I am in the same boat as you. Thom Jones stories hit me on such a different level than the other authors you mention in your post.

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Not to be weird, but I got to know Thom and loved his work, so it's tougher for me to go there.

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I'm sure you incorporate it in other general lessons. I think when I brought in work the 2nd or 3rd time. You stated that my ending was similar to the way Thom ended one of his stories. Something about a diver who can no longer dive. The line was, I have been deep and now I need to go faster or something like that. So having never read any of his stuff and seeing some posts about him on your substack made we want to go read him. It was nice to read some of his stories and see very clearly how he particularized objects. For whatever reason the examples seemed so crisp in Thom's writing. Like the part about the lemon lime bug-juice (military kool-aid), the on the body, the use of onomatopoeia, and in the Pugilist how he goes into the story about Theogenes right after the moment of greatest tension. One story alone was like a 2x4 to the face. I wouldn't say it was an Ah-ha moment because I'm still trying to incorporate it. Going to workshop and reading this substack have giving me a greater understanding of the elements of a good story. Which indirectly helps me understand Thom's work.

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I go back and forth between trying to craft magical sentences and trying to just practice numerous techniques in a short story. At some point it will become more innate. It feels like some of the basic tenants of minimalism are falling into place due to workshopping, your substack, Monica Drake's substack, and putting in the work.

Most of my best short story ideas have come from one sentence.

I'm excited to show the work I've done in crafting my latest voice.

Thank you for the lesson. Do you have the link to the NPR interview?

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author

We scuttled the NPR interview. It would've been more like the WWF than NPR.

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This interview has to be on the internet lurking some place. I couldn't find your interview with Craig Ferguson. I gotta find this NPR wrestling match now haha

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Hempelizing a phrase, like “Those who can’t repeat the past are condemned to remember it," is another way to generate gems. (From The Dog of the Marriage.)

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Get a list of common metaphors/cliches and randomly cut/paste them. You get some hilarious results.

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Hi Chuck,

I wrote my senior thesis on minimalism in college. It was always a pain to have to elbow out Hemingway when talking about it to my professors. I'm not proud of failing to stand by my analysis, but just to avoid being on defense all the time, I just replaced with minimalism with Lishism. Then within a year or two, you put out Consider This, and in just a couple short paragraphs you wrapped up the broad strokes of my thesis.

Hi Everyone,

Another fun fiddly bit about Minimalism: as Amy Hempel and Mary Robison started inching away from Lish and Minimalism, they cribbed a separate term from Carver: Essentialism. I think it might be a tomato/potato type thing, but it's been almost a decade since I've read on the topic.

For the super nerds out there, here's a couple pieces from Garielle Lutz, one of Lish's last superstars.

The Sentence is a Lonely Place gets really intellectual with the phonetics that drive a sentence sonically. See Chuck's mud sentence.

https://sites.evergreen.edu/eyeofthestory/wp-content/uploads/sites/137/2016/02/The-Believer-The-Sentence-Is-a-Lonely-Place.pdf

And then one step further, from the same author, we have the Poetry of the Paragraph. This merges the association of topic as described by Hempel and Chuck in a nonlinear fashion, and binds those sentences in a paragraph with sound as the glue.

https://www.3ammagazine.com/3am/the-poetry-of-the-paragraph-some-notes/

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I think the care with sentences is why I can always go back to Jenny Offill.

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founding

I love homework so much.

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founding

That's what I love about vector art and logo design. When you create it, every line counts and if it's not perfect...DO IT AGAIN!

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Now life is awful again.

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I’ll forget you, I will.

While yet you are still, burning inside my brain.

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I love this reminder. I remember Lish/Tom talking about the purposeful dissonance of burnt tongue. How the wrongness circumvents the well-worn channels of received text, thus touching on a new sensory experience.

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Yes! It creates all the euphoria of learning to read for the first time.

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Exactly

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I like this one a lot. I remember once reading a Kurt Vonnegut quote that said something to the effect of, some writers take time writing a story over and over again and others make sure every sentence is perfect before the move on.

In some cases I find a transmogrification of other peoples work can help the creative process along.

Like: “with severe anxiety everything bright white hot light. Your blood boils and your shit turns to liquid.”

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Hmmm... it's that similar to how typos hook us?

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I have dream diary and I wrote down some words said to me by a prototypical panhandler, “you will do as I am told.” When I read it was like wtf? Strange on so many levels. Just enough I’ll never forget it, or the dream.

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