I can imagine the proposition that these are not, in fact, robotic postings, but rather some poor sap that has been hired to do them. This poor sap is the protagonist of our story, and the regular text would then be punctuated by the various ads he posts (because he is telling this story while at work) sort of like the "I am Joe's...." and the ad text would degenerate as the protagonist falls apart.
You get some weird ads, man. Not me though. All I get is quizzes that allow me to win Apple products and ads from women whose husbands are dead and who don’t want to marry, but just want to fuck.
Wil Dalton from this Substack has a super cool story called, "The Thing" where he utilized this spam bot language. Without spoiling his story (hopefully he's shopping it around right now), this worked in his particular story because 1) it fit with the unconventional format he used throughout and 2) he used the spam bot sparingly, which made it very funny to stumble upon. Hopefully everyone will be able to read Wil's story soon, it's super good.
I’ve always noticed that those ads are the complete opposite of what we try to do as writers. Lazy writing. Tons of cliché. Often dramatic events resolved by a product. Just saying.
"MisszVIC£~Hey Baby! Head on over to ~ah73461~ muy camshowxxx for big surprisze!"
Huh. Wonder that could be. Maybe it's one of those live-feeds that are always active in places like wildlife reserves in Africa. That could be cool to check out.
Gotta learn how to write effectively in my own voice first. Using this sort of language is a fun new problem to solve for the writer, but what does the reader gain?
Edit: people who like this sort of thing - please sell me on the idea.
"For limited time only! Invest in AstelCoin to make big $$$!!! Our bitcoin has avalue of 18.978 USD and is one of the fast rising coins onthe market! We're willing togive a wallet containg 500 AC to the first 5 peopleto contact us@ notapumpandumpcryptoscam@yougullibledipshit.com! Don;t miss out!"
Online ads are all fun and games until you realise that the love of your life turns out to be a Nigerian warlord who has been using the giant love-heart boxes full of chocolates you've been sending him to feed his child soldiers with.
“ I hate to quit bothering you, but you have been selected for our work from home system we have 5 spots left. All that is required is a smart phone or laptop and 2 hours of free time a day. Claim your $500 a day position here”
The “I hate to quit bothering you” is what gets me.
I see these all the time on Instagram:
“_hayden_paid I'm Paying 5 Grand For
The First 8 People To Message Me With
"ALIVE" Cus I Feel people Are Going
Through Hard Time Rn!!!!! God Bless Y'all”
I can imagine the proposition that these are not, in fact, robotic postings, but rather some poor sap that has been hired to do them. This poor sap is the protagonist of our story, and the regular text would then be punctuated by the various ads he posts (because he is telling this story while at work) sort of like the "I am Joe's...." and the ad text would degenerate as the protagonist falls apart.
Solid idea! I'll keep my eyes open
I’m sorry but what on God’s green earth is the abomination that headlines this post?
You get some weird ads, man. Not me though. All I get is quizzes that allow me to win Apple products and ads from women whose husbands are dead and who don’t want to marry, but just want to fuck.
Wil Dalton from this Substack has a super cool story called, "The Thing" where he utilized this spam bot language. Without spoiling his story (hopefully he's shopping it around right now), this worked in his particular story because 1) it fit with the unconventional format he used throughout and 2) he used the spam bot sparingly, which made it very funny to stumble upon. Hopefully everyone will be able to read Wil's story soon, it's super good.
I’ve always noticed that those ads are the complete opposite of what we try to do as writers. Lazy writing. Tons of cliché. Often dramatic events resolved by a product. Just saying.
I’m gonna have fun with this.
"MisszVIC£~Hey Baby! Head on over to ~ah73461~ muy camshowxxx for big surprisze!"
Huh. Wonder that could be. Maybe it's one of those live-feeds that are always active in places like wildlife reserves in Africa. That could be cool to check out.
Gotta learn how to write effectively in my own voice first. Using this sort of language is a fun new problem to solve for the writer, but what does the reader gain?
Edit: people who like this sort of thing - please sell me on the idea.
Another charming and thoughtful post. I enjoyed the Elvis Costello reference in the title, too. Thank you so much.
"For limited time only! Invest in AstelCoin to make big $$$!!! Our bitcoin has avalue of 18.978 USD and is one of the fast rising coins onthe market! We're willing togive a wallet containg 500 AC to the first 5 peopleto contact us@ notapumpandumpcryptoscam@yougullibledipshit.com! Don;t miss out!"
Online ads are all fun and games until you realise that the love of your life turns out to be a Nigerian warlord who has been using the giant love-heart boxes full of chocolates you've been sending him to feed his child soldiers with.
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“ I hate to quit bothering you, but you have been selected for our work from home system we have 5 spots left. All that is required is a smart phone or laptop and 2 hours of free time a day. Claim your $500 a day position here”
The “I hate to quit bothering you” is what gets me.
Pick up paper towels and orange juice on the way home.
Fortunately, I figured out how to direct this kind of stuff to the spam folder.