Mine would be like that movie Her with Joaquin Phoenix except instead of falling in love with her the guy refuses to pay for her OnlyFans then sends her info to the IRS.
Sssooo this is strange but I just threw on a new Netflix series called You and one of the first lines is one character in a bookstore asking the employee "do you have anything by Paula Fox?"
I can mix her in with the story I want to write about the woman who managed to accumulate 16 million dick pics. 16 million. It's like pondering the size of the universe. Forget the "Why?" How? Liberally speaking, you'd think that after a sample size of about 100,000 you'd get a pretty good idea of what ALL of them look like without much more variation. Was she looking for something specific? Was she naming them?
If my boss said "Candice! I want 200,000 dicks on my desk by tomorrow!" I have 9 years of solid I.T. experience and I think I would be able to produce that amount of content in short time frame. 16 MILLION? That's just SERIOUS work!? When would you even have time to enjoy your dick pics? You'd be too busy dick mining all day!
I submitted a resume with the sentence: "I was responsible for creating and maintaining the Carnal website." "CalCRN" was auto-corrected to "Carnal" and I failed to proof-read it. I should've just kept the auto-correct so I can double-down in interviews and be like "Sir! Excuse me but I've more than moved past my seedy past of fart porn and floppy, double-ended dildos and I'm a better person for it!" At least I'd be memorable.
Reminds me of opening a menu in a San Diego diner to find "fashionable waffles." It wasn't until watching the movie 'Little Miss Sunshine' that I learned "a la mode" means "in the fashion."
I once sent my husband a text message that said "package for you, coraline I think" as he was waiting on a dvd he'd ordered that hadn't turned up. Anyway after I'd sent it I discovered our lovely little friend auto-correct had changed the word coraline to cocaine. 😳
I remember going to an Aeon Mall in Hiroshima Japan and seeing a children's clothing store named Starvations. I think it was suppose to be a combination of star and ovation but sadly they combined the words incorrectly for fabulous comedic effect. I took pictures of the store but sadly I could find pictures of it on Google maps to share here. Just imagine a bright green and yellow sign unknowing convincing Japanese toddlers that they needed to eat less to fit into their fashionable play clothes.
For me it's omissions. I leave words out. Important ones. I put a sticky on a coworker's desk once. It was supposed to say "Please see me tomorrow." But I left out the word see.
It wouldn't be a party without you, PaulaFox!
We should all write a story about Paula.
Mine would be like that movie Her with Joaquin Phoenix except instead of falling in love with her the guy refuses to pay for her OnlyFans then sends her info to the IRS.
(btw look at her follows lmao)
Sssooo this is strange but I just threw on a new Netflix series called You and one of the first lines is one character in a bookstore asking the employee "do you have anything by Paula Fox?"
I can mix her in with the story I want to write about the woman who managed to accumulate 16 million dick pics. 16 million. It's like pondering the size of the universe. Forget the "Why?" How? Liberally speaking, you'd think that after a sample size of about 100,000 you'd get a pretty good idea of what ALL of them look like without much more variation. Was she looking for something specific? Was she naming them?
If my boss said "Candice! I want 200,000 dicks on my desk by tomorrow!" I have 9 years of solid I.T. experience and I think I would be able to produce that amount of content in short time frame. 16 MILLION? That's just SERIOUS work!? When would you even have time to enjoy your dick pics? You'd be too busy dick mining all day!
And why didn't she stop at 15 million? She really needed that extra million?
Was she looking for a variation on a theme?
Bonus points to the person who can somehow Incorporate the strawberry emoji as a 'thematic gun'.
Chickens tend to get surly when you chop off their heads. Go figure.
I submitted a resume with the sentence: "I was responsible for creating and maintaining the Carnal website." "CalCRN" was auto-corrected to "Carnal" and I failed to proof-read it. I should've just kept the auto-correct so I can double-down in interviews and be like "Sir! Excuse me but I've more than moved past my seedy past of fart porn and floppy, double-ended dildos and I'm a better person for it!" At least I'd be memorable.
Reminds me of opening a menu in a San Diego diner to find "fashionable waffles." It wasn't until watching the movie 'Little Miss Sunshine' that I learned "a la mode" means "in the fashion."
That, I love.
I once sent my husband a text message that said "package for you, coraline I think" as he was waiting on a dvd he'd ordered that hadn't turned up. Anyway after I'd sent it I discovered our lovely little friend auto-correct had changed the word coraline to cocaine. 😳
I remember going to an Aeon Mall in Hiroshima Japan and seeing a children's clothing store named Starvations. I think it was suppose to be a combination of star and ovation but sadly they combined the words incorrectly for fabulous comedic effect. I took pictures of the store but sadly I could find pictures of it on Google maps to share here. Just imagine a bright green and yellow sign unknowing convincing Japanese toddlers that they needed to eat less to fit into their fashionable play clothes.
oh no 😂
OH dear. (omitting many optically inappropriate jokes here)
Just saw one of these that said:
"I'm a bubble tea
Suck my balls."
(I'm pretty sure it was deliberate though)
See! It's the undecidability of it. "Swallow" my balls might work better.
For me it's omissions. I leave words out. Important ones. I put a sticky on a coworker's desk once. It was supposed to say "Please see me tomorrow." But I left out the word see.
Please see PaulaFox tomorrow.
Delicious!