135 Comments
Comment deleted
May 5, 2022
Comment deleted
Expand full comment
author

Yes... the strange jewelry produced by the fish-like denizens of Ipswich.

Expand full comment
Comment deleted
May 5, 2022
Comment deleted
Expand full comment
Comment deleted
May 5, 2022
Comment deleted
Expand full comment
Comment deleted
May 6, 2022
Comment deleted
Expand full comment
author

Duh.

Expand full comment
Comment removed
May 5, 2022
Comment removed
Expand full comment
founding

Careful, or you're gonna win yourself a cursed jewel!!!!!

Expand full comment
Comment removed
May 5, 2022
Comment removed
Expand full comment
founding

No spank you!!

Expand full comment
author

Dig deep for facts and anecdotes. The next accursed jewel will be a doozy.

Expand full comment
Comment removed
May 5, 2022
Comment removed
Expand full comment

(I survived an elevator with Michael Ross)

Expand full comment
author

The Egg Man. He was skinny. I think you mentioned that.

Expand full comment

He wasn't large. They transported him a wheelchair they shackled him and tried covering that with a white hospital sheet. 3 guards to push a wheelchair.......

Expand full comment

And anyone deserves a King Tut sized curse would be my sister and I'll give you her address should I win......

Expand full comment

Kinda diabolical........

Expand full comment

You think us February Pisces are so fascinated with death because we are born at the end of winter when everything is absolutely beyond dead????

Expand full comment
Comment removed
May 5, 2022
Comment removed
Expand full comment

Let me be the one to test drive it then. Pick me. Pick me. Pickmepickmepickme!!!!!

Expand full comment
Comment removed
May 5, 2022
Comment removed
Expand full comment

Deep........you are aware I've had an exorcism right???? I very real authentic Roman Catholic Exorcism...... If anyone can, I can lol

Expand full comment
Comment removed
May 5, 2022
Comment removed
Expand full comment
founding

DuckTales!! You're bringing back all my favs...

Expand full comment

Like I have no idea how to win this but I wanted a cursed jewel. I love jewels. The millionaires given me a few but none that are cursed.......... Like now you are killing me. If I knew that you had such a collection ida stuck around Portland longer lololol......

Expand full comment

To the future winner, I propose a trade...........

Expand full comment

Shari Lewis wore it when she wrote "The Song that Doesnt End". She also had her hand up lamb chops bum at the time.

Expand full comment

Oh wow. And I thought Orville the duck was strange.

Expand full comment

When in possession of the Eye of Cheops, watch out for those moments when you walk into a room and forget why. That’s your brain letting go of precious memories as it rots inside out.

Expand full comment

Can’t find much so far. But I love that you keep cursed objects. Family members often give me their dead relatives trinkets or baubles so I can remember them. I have a whole curio cabinet filled with them. Dunno if any of them are cursed but I like to think a piece of them is imbued in the objects and if I had the right magic I could revive their souls for questioning and advice.

Expand full comment

Is this for real? How deep do we need to dig? A quick google search doesn’t seem to be pulling anything up on the eye of cheops. Or anything connecting Mansfield, Entwhistle, or Short.

Expand full comment

Can you give us a hint? I’m guessing there is a history of Hollywood book?

Expand full comment

I did just learn about Jayne Mansfield’s cursed history and pink house. Yikes!

Expand full comment
author

And you call yourself a writer. AND YOU CALL YOURSELF A WRITER?!

Expand full comment

Feel like that time I wondered around the shop asking for a left-handed screwdriver. With luck, cursed jewels will be a trivia night topic soon.

Expand full comment
author

I got a banana peeler I wanna sell you, kid.

Expand full comment

And some tartan paint.

Expand full comment

Some interesting stuff for sure, but yep, I can't find anything either.

Expand full comment
author

YOU TOO!?

Expand full comment

Ok.....I found that the Eye Of Cheops once formed part of a much bigger stone, given to Queen Victoria on the death of her husband Prince Albert by the poor of Ireland. This stone was used in the creation of the Royal Albert Hall and is said to be located directly beneath the area now used for the stage. During WW2 the building was used as shelter during bombings. One night two teenagers, David and Simon, explored the building and chipped a small piece of, that they turned into the brooch, which David wanted to give to a girl he wished to impress.

When he did this, the girl was so impressed she agreed to take his hand in marriage. On the wedding night they had intercourse for the first time, and David, now a young man, found his newly married wife had a venereal disease, a weeping, pustulating, oozing white smear of fish-smelling mush. Knowing nothing of such things the young man thought this was natural, and completed intercourse unknowing that he had transmitted the virus to himself.

Two weeks later Simon had been given an anolrectal disease. AIDS was born.

Expand full comment
author

Oh dear.

Expand full comment

Prior to being locked away in the LAPD vault, rumour has it that Isadora Duncan was too drawn to the ruby gem. Feeling it would be the perfect accompaniment for her fine silk scarf.

Expand full comment
author

Exactly.

Expand full comment

I’ve managed to uncover some more of the Cheop’s heinous past. It turns out before Duncan wore it, it had been a very busy cursed gem indeed.

The below covers elevator deaths, a link to the Flying Tailor, a case of spontaneous combustion and of course Netflix. Here’s what I’ve pieced together of the legacy so far:

Many will have you believe Benjamin Taylor A Bell moved to Canada due to mourning the death of his mother. This is somewhat true but he was also desperate to find love. Soon after arriving in Canada, he met Louisa. A somewhat dull woman, but she reminded him of his mother. One day on his usual walk to his office, he stopped abruptly as a bright red broach caught his eye in the window. Perfect for Louisa. Acquiring the broach and back on his path, he felt he couldn’t take his eyes from the dazzling red encrusted stones. Still drawn and on auto pilot, he swung open the incorrect door and fell down an disused elevator shaft to his death.

From Canada it’s said that a clean up team for Bell’s bloody remains found the broach still clutched in his hand. One was well versed in the occult and recognised the Eye of the Cheops straight away. Desperate to get the cursed gem as far as possible, they hoyed it onto SS Île de France.

Somewhat later the gem arrived in Paris, a ship worked had found it, greedily pocketing it with the intention to pawn it as soon as they could.

From there it attracted the attention of Katherine Reichelt. Her husband, Franz, was a tailor and made her many beautiful gowns that she just knew the red accents of the gems would look great with. Not only was he a tailor however, but he was also an inventor. Katherine found him quirky to say the least, but felt the fine threads were worth the price. Franz had been working on new design for a parachute, using his finest materials. What a better way to show off his skills as both tailor and inventor by leaping and sailing down from the Eiffel Tower. On the morning of the jump, Katherine kissed Franz goodbye and attached her broach to his parachute. A reminder of her and for good luck.

From here we’re up to speed with what research proved earlier, The Eye of the Cheops travelled from Paris to Nice. But how did it wind up back in Los Angeles? The Eye of the Cheops history is a little unclear during this period. What we have discovered is one of the last times it was spotted before being locked away was in Florida. Police were called after neighbours reported a strange smell emitting from the home of Mary Reeser. Upon arrival the door looked intact, with no signs of foul play or entry but sure enough there was the stench that had been reported. After entering the property, there wasn’t much out of place, however upon the couch the police found a pile of ash, teeth and a pretty little red broach that seemed completely unscathed from the fire. The strange story of Mary’s apparent self combustion made the press. A photo was used of Mary taken just a few days prior at a family picnic wearing her broach. A keen gemologist with a penchant for the mysterious, rang the Florida police straight away - warning them what they had was the Eye of the Cheops. A broach with a deadly history that had claimed many over time. The broach was packaged up immediately and sent to LAPD’s vault to be sealed away.

The last mention to be found of the Eye of the Cheops is a 2019 interview between the Safdie bothers and GQ, where they casually name drop the Eye of the Cheops as being the inspiration of their new Adam Sandler hit Uncut Gems

Expand full comment
author

Darn, I'd give this to you just for mentioning the Ile de France, my favorite boat, second only to the Normandie. But I'm -- truth told -- fishing for a non-previous-winner.

Expand full comment

Ahhh thank you and that’s totally the right thing to do. It was fun just to participate! I’m an avid reader but I’ve not written anything creatively since prior to graduating in 2009.

Also could definitely see myself going down a rabbit hole of unusual deaths. Off to go and see if there’s a podcast that covers cases like that rather than just murders/true crime!

Expand full comment
founding

😳

Expand full comment

Who? What? Where? When?

Huh?

Expand full comment
founding

Let's just say I hope Chuck puts some sage in your package too...

Expand full comment

I think I’ll be placing the package in a ring of salt and will be wearing multiple charms while going about opening it.

Expand full comment
author

Yeah, Carole Lombard did that. Worked like a charm. Plane crash the next day.

Expand full comment

Alright, that’s it. I’m wearing the garlic wreath.

Expand full comment
author

Natalie Wood wore that same necklace while swimming. You do the math.

Expand full comment

Jewel + my possession = Fucked?

Expand full comment

Maegan, can you win for me this time????

Expand full comment
founding

I’ve just finished serving 28 years bad luck accumulated from broken mirrors accidents as a kid. No WAY am I dabbling in this. You’re on your own!!

Expand full comment

I may win this by default..........

Expand full comment

Been absent here a bit (life stuff), come back to it and get immediately sucked into this rabbit-hole. All I've found is that Jayne Mansfield had a house I'm very envious of.....

https://flashbak.com/inside-jayne-mansfields-pink-palace-the-graceland-of-hollywood-428153/

Expand full comment

In the first edition of the Bible, the story goes that Abel has found this stone and Cain envied it, so he killed Abel and took the stone giving it the first red tint. Later, Cain gave the stone to Cheops who named it Eye of Cheops and then Cain slept with Cheops's wife, but Cheops killed them both with the Eye of Cheops.

Expand full comment
author

That's the spirit!

Expand full comment

oh are we supposed to just make stuff up?

Expand full comment
author

Your JOB is to scare Brandan. Whatever that takes.

Expand full comment

Have I ever mentioned how terrified I am of large sums of money being donated to a patreon which I just now coincidentally created?

Expand full comment
Comment deleted
May 6, 2022
Comment deleted
Expand full comment

It might give me proxy frustration.

Expand full comment

I didn't make it up. All true.

Expand full comment
founding

I’m torn here. I want to win a cursed jewel, but I get freaked out walking through Egyptian exhibits in museums. I’ll do some digging, though. The google hole is familiar ground...

Expand full comment
founding

Coming back from our honeymoon, my husband and I stopped for a quick glance at the Ohio State Reformatory in Mansfield, where some of The Shawshank Redemption was filmed. (Spooky!!!) Driving around the area, could have been West Virginia even, we happened upon a Museum of Cursed Things. No Thanks, with a capital NO! Haha! Hit the gas and never looked back. I'm more of a lucky charm collector myself. :)

Expand full comment
Comment removed
May 5, 2022
Comment removed
Expand full comment
founding

Ooh scary!!!!!! I love Unsolved Mysteries! I think it's on Netflix now? I'll have to search for the episode...

Expand full comment
Comment removed
May 5, 2022
Comment removed
Expand full comment
founding

Oh it's a new one on Netflix? Boo. I'm so out of touch with TV. Yeah, I'm with you, I want 90s Unsolved Mysteries.

Expand full comment

I found an anonymous post on the darknet indicating the Eye is responsible for a total of 23 deaths thus far, one for each season of Law and Order: SVU. Clearly, Jayne's daughter learned some of its secrets.

Expand full comment
author

Oooooo... you're so close to winning the next cursed bauble from hell.

Expand full comment

I am still unconvinced that the stuffed squirrel has my best intentions at heart, sir.

Expand full comment
author

Don't give it any food after midnight. You've been warned.

Expand full comment

Information I could have used 17 years ago, Chuck!

Expand full comment